Welcome, John Colfax!

John Colfax Poulter Glanzer was born Friday, August 29 at 8:18am, measuring in at 8 lbs., 7 oz. and 21.5″ long. Lauren spent only 10 minutes pushing after 10 days of intense contractions. Our Doula Leia was a tremendous help.

For the next couple days we’ll remain at St. David’s North in Austin. Sleep has been tough to come by so far, but little John is happy and healthy–and rather hiccuppy–so that is the main thing. And Lauren is making a full recovery.

My laptop hard drive crashed last night so I have only my phone, so updating on the blog will be difficult for a while, but thought I’d better get something up!

The name John is an extremely common name, but less so in recent years. It didn’t enter the finalists until we neared the due date. John is the middle name of both Dad and Grandpa Dick, so there is a family connection. Colfax Poulter is the full middle name. Colfax was the street we once lived on in Minneapolis where so much fun was had. Lauren had the idea for a Minneapolis themed middle name, and Colfax won out. And obviously Poulter is Lauren’s maiden name. The last name is just Glanzer, so don’t be confused.

I’ll write more later when I have access to a computer. Here are some Day 1 photos.









Ryan’s NFL Predictions 2014

Before I forget… Here are my 2014 NFL Predictions. I hope my predictions are way off.

AFC East NFC East
Patriots 12-4 Eagles 10-6
Bills 8-8 Cowboys 8-8
Dolphins 7-9 Giants 6-10
Jets 3-13 Redskins 3-13
AFC North NFC North
Steelers 9-7 Packers 10-6
Bengals* 9-7 Bears 10-6
Ravens 7-9 Vikings 8-8
Browns 3-13 Lions 6-10
AFC South NFC South
Colts 11-5 Saints 11-5
Jaguars 7-9 Panthers 10-6
Texans 5-11 Falcons 7-9
Titans 4-12 Buccaneers 6-10
AFC West NFC West
Broncos 14-2 Seahawks 12-4
Chargers* 10-6 49ers* 10-6
Chiefs 7-9 Cardinals* 10-6
Raiders 4-12 Rams 9-7


Byes: Broncos (1), Patriots (2); Seahawks (1), Saints (2)

Wild Card Round: Colts def. Bengals, Chargers def. Steelers, Cardinals def. Packers, Eagles def. 49ers
Divisional Round: Broncos def. Chargers, Patriots def. Colts, Cardinals def. Seahawks, Saints def. Eagles
Conference: Patriots def. Broncos, Cardinals def. Saints
Super Bowl: Patriots def. Cardinals

Update: No News

If you came here looking for the latest news around the impending arrival of the baby, I am sorry to report to you that nothing’s new. Lauren, the trooper she is, has hung in there. She’s been in great discomfort and has mostly been confined to the house since last Wednesday. But the end is in sight, as we’ve got an appointment Friday morning to get things moving along. Again, for the latest, follow me on Twitter at @rcglanzer. This way I don’t have to annoy 900+ Facebook friends with updates.

In the mean time, since you took time out of your busy day to come visit this blog, I am going to humor you with a video I took with my new dashboard cam of my drive to work a couple weeks ago, sped up like 3000%. It skips a few times while I was tinkering with settings, but for the most part the drive is in tact.

In a Holding Pattern

I just took a peek at my blog stats, and every day since August 17, the site traffic has skyrocketed upwards! Like 3 times normal viewership. My first guess is everyone is really excited this time of year due to my birthday, and they’re checking in to see if I had a good 32nd birthday or not. The answer is yes, it was a fine birthday. Probably the least exciting of any birthday I’ve ever had, but I suppose you could categorize it under relaxing. I got a birthday call from Patrick. We did some light shopping. I took a nap. We went to Buffalo Wild Wings with friends at night.

There’s also the distinct possibility that many people are checking in for baby updates, as the baby was in fact due seven days ago! Sorry folks, no news. In fact, there are only three valid guesses still out there on the baby pool after today (Eddie Guerra, 25th; Bobbi Jo Chapman, 26th; Douwe Rienstra, 29th). The only news to report is Anne has been in town to help with the baby, and her entire four-night stay is in jeopardy of missing the baby completely! But, what can you do? The baby will come when he/she is damn good and ready. We should be cherishing this unexpected extra down time, I suppose.

But, that makes it a bit difficult to do things. For starters, Lauren being pregnant or not, it is fiery hot outside. We’re looking at our 15th straight day in the hundreds, without having seen a drop of rain since July 17. It is just too blazing hot to justify going outside because I’ll be a sweaty mess in under a minute standing still. 30 seconds if I’m moving. 15 seconds if I’m moving briskly. I coasted on my bike down to the mailbox with Baxter in tow and we came back to the house pooped out. Maybe native Texans can stand to do things outside in this weather, but I am not among them. This is every bit as bad as -40º with a windchill, in my opinion.

Secondly, Lauren is of course 41 weeks pregnant, so if we did think of something interesting to do at a cool indoor location, we don’t really want to go too far away, and we also can’t be doing things that involve much physical activity. Thirdly, we shouldn’t be spending much money because once Lauren goes on maternity leave our household income drops off. These factors have kinda left us confined to the cool indoors of our house, where I tend to go stir crazy rather quickly.

I have no problems sitting inside and messing around online and watching TV all day… if it’s overcast or rainy outside. But as soon as the sun comes out I can’t do it. If we had blackout curtains all over the house, maybe. But something about it being sunny tells me I am a horrible person for sitting around the house. And something about it being 105º outside tells me I’m an idiot for going outside. So this combination of things makes me feel very trapped and makes me panicky. So, that’s where I’m at right now. I haven’t a clue how to spend the rest of this Sunday.

My best idea that matches all criteria… we go walk around the Lakeline Mall. It’s nearby. It’s cool. It’s indoors. We still get some exercise and move around. We don’t necessarily have to spend any money. Baxter–in dire need of exercise–still has to stay home in his crate, so it’s not foolproof, but it’s something. Oh wait, tomorrow’s the first day of school so the mall will be overrun with last-minute shoppers. That just leaves getting drunk, but then again I need to be able to drive to the hospital in an emergency.

A Wild Finale To Being 31

On Friday, I lived out my final day as an everyday-ho-hum 31-year-old. 31 is one of those rare prime number ages where the first digit is three times the second digit. The last time I was such an age was 0, and the next time will be when I’m 62, and then not again until 93. Next I’ll be 32, one of those beautifully divisible numbers. 32-16-8-4-2-1. Everything goes into 32.

I woke up around 4am to see Lauren working out the discomfort of contractions. Not shocking, seeing as they’d been happening for the past 48 hours. She said they were now very intense, down to 3-5 minutes apart, and had been consistent for a couple hours. She didn’t want to wake me, but once I had woken up on my own I knew it was time to head to the hospital. We gathered our things and called the OBGYN emergency line and they instructed us to go on to the hospital. We called the doula and she too would be on her way shortly.

We arrived at 4:45, and over the course of the next four hours, things quieted down dramatically and we were sent home. It was an emotional experience, thinking we were so close and then being told we weren’t really so close at all. But we were also applauded for coming in, as all signs pointed to it being time. By this point I was a little groggy but well awake and figured I’d just go in to the office even though I’d told everyone in an e-mail I’d “definitely not be in.” I did do some work but was wiped out by noon and took a half day.

As I was leaving work, I noticed my car’s front left tire had a big screw stuck in it. I carefully drove to Discount Tire and had to have the whole tire replaced… free of charge, thankfully, as I had the foresight to purchase a lifetime warranty. But still, another 90 minutes out of my day. I wandered over to get an iced coffee while waiting for my tire to be repaired, and in a daze somehow didn’t see the creamer right smack in front of me. Confused, I picked up a demo container of some sort enclosed in plastic and attempted to empty it into my coffee. A laughing employee informed me this was a display item for purchase and not only did it not contain any cream, it was still in its packaging.

Then I came home and crashed for a couple hours. Lauren, Anne, and I went to Whole Foods and got stuff for dinner, came home, and ate outside, enjoying a nice but muggy evening. We watched some standup comedy, I drank some birthday wine, we received a surprise delivery of warm cookies from Tiff’s Treats (thanks, Megos!) and then watched the Twins pile on an amazing 20 runs against the Tigers.

And that’s how I spent my final day as a 31-year-old.

Glanzer Family Tree Update

Sorry to those of you checking in for the latest baby news. There isn’t much to speak of today. We had a bit of excitement early in the morning, but nothing ever materialized despite me staying home from work just in case. While I was home, however, I did dig a bit further into some family history!

I have found at least some info on all 16 great-great-grandparents. I am missing maiden names for three of the great-great-grandmothers. If I can uncover that info, it should lead to more discoveries!

The Glanzer Side
Paul M. Glanzer (Russia) & Anna Tschetter (Russia)
Elias J. Wipf (Russia) & Rebecca Hofer (Russia)

The Froke Side
Otto A. Froke (Iowa) & Georgia ? (South Dakota)
Jacob Babler (Switzerland) & Barbara Aultman (Switzerland)

The Bell Side
Clarence Bell (Illinois) & Lula Shoecraft (Michigan)
Daniel Pendexter (New Hampshire) & Ida Ferris (Wisconsin)

The Petersen Side
Roy Terry (Texas) & Effie ? (Germany)
George Benefiel (Iowa) & Florence ? (Iowa)

Beyond that, I have also uncovered at least some info on 22 of my 32 great-great-great grandparents.

The Glanzer Side
Matthias Glanzer (South Russia) & Anna Wurz (Ukraine)
Jacob Tschetter (South Russia) & Katharina Decker (?)
Zacharias Wipf (South Russia) & Maria Muller (South Russia)
Michael Hofer (Russia) & Sarah Waldner (Russia)

The Froke Side
Christian Ole Froke (Iowa) & Bertha Olsen Anderson (Norway)
Paulus Aultman (Switzerland) & Barbara Margaret Klassi (Switzerland)

The Bell Side
Johnathan Bell (Illinois) & Emma Vannorsdel (Pennsylvania)
Jacob Shoecraft (Michigan) & Nancy V. Norton (Michigan)
Daniel Pendexter (New Hampshire) & Harriet Orsay Cushman (Maine)
Benjamin Ferris (New York) & Mary Angeline McCallister (Ohio)

The Petersen Side
Jason Benefiel (Indiana) & Maria C. Beatty (Pennsylvania)

Surprisingly my two grandfathers’ sides are completely filled in, but the grandmothers–Froke and Petersen–are full of holes. I did notice that on the Benefiel side of the family there are several children named after presidents–George Washington Benefiel, Thomas Jefferson Benefiel, etc.

Beyond that, I also have at least partial information for at least 42 of the 64 great-great-great-great grandparents, and at least partial info on over 70 great-great-great-great-great-great grandparents! But that will just have to wait for another day… and there must be an easier way to say it than all those “greats”.

And Now We Play The Waiting Game…

As you have clearly noticed, the due date of August 17 has come and gone, and the baby is yet to be born! No big surprises there, I’d say. Many predicted the first baby to go over the due date by a few days. We’ve tried three straight nights of eating various foods to get things moving: on Saturday it was southern fare at Jack Allen’s. Sunday it was hatch green chile fest at Chuy’s. And last night Lauren painstakingly prepared an eggplant dish that–although very delicious–also did not induce labor! Most people have their own suggestions for us, and of course we are all ears. Many mothers who have had a baby will pinpoint the moment they went into labor and tell us something to the effect of “yep, I happened to be sitting in the bath tub fully clothed eating a lamb shank when I went into labor, so you should try that!”

But there will be no sitting around waiting for things to happen. We’ll go on with our weeks as usual, both going to work. Some have wondered why Lauren wouldn’t just sit at home, rest up, and wait for the moment to come, but that will cut into her maternity leave and/or PTO, and she feels like she’d go stir crazy sitting at home waiting around.

It is looking more and more possible that I’ll have a birthday buddy! That has to be fairly rare, like 1 in 365 babies born. I do have a college roommate who just had a daughter born on his birthday, so it’s not unheard of!